What a pal.

Imagine you're competing in an amateurs golf competition on a Sunday morning. In between rounds you check your cell phone and discover six voicemails and two text messages from a friend whose place you're staying at during the competition. One of the messages includes a reference to Katie, your friend's girlfriend. Here's what your friend says:

"Something has happened to Katie. It was an accident. There is blood everywhere in the unit. We have told police it's you. How do you feel about that?"

Welcome to Brent Watson's world. After leaving the golf course, Watson smartly contacted police to refute his friend's lie. Why would a friend act so outrageously? Because the friend is a high-profile NRL player named Greg Bird (shown above) who, like many Aussie blokes after a few too many beers, found it necessary to smash his glass into the face of another person, in this case his girlfriend Katie. She's undergone surgery to save her eye and is being comforted by her North American parents. Bird has been banned by his club, the Cronulla Sharks, for the final few games of the season.

No word on whether he'll accept a lifetime offer to captain an all-star squad of Gutless Cowards.